Tuesday, August 01, 2006
ENGLISH AS THE OFFICIAL LANGUAGE
By Stockton
Support for making English the official language of the United States is growing. Approximately 80% of the nation believes English should be given some type of recognition as the 'official' language of the nation.
Nowhere is support for such a proposition as strong as it is among white, southern Republicans. Luckily, we were able to interview some fine GOP folks down south about this all-important issue.
Cletus Featherstone, a locust breeder from Arkansas, has this to say:
"Ifum gummit do jus one thang, itum sha be makin 'Merican dis lagish."
Hobe Ferris, a soil importer from Eastern Tennessee, said this:
"Gots nuffin' ginst no furners but done wan none comin' here talkin 'Nadian or Mexican talk."
Finally, Jaspar Hollins, crucifix salesman:
"Who ya all callin' a yokel?"
Support for making English the official language of the United States is growing. Approximately 80% of the nation believes English should be given some type of recognition as the 'official' language of the nation.
Nowhere is support for such a proposition as strong as it is among white, southern Republicans. Luckily, we were able to interview some fine GOP folks down south about this all-important issue.
Cletus Featherstone, a locust breeder from Arkansas, has this to say:
"Ifum gummit do jus one thang, itum sha be makin 'Merican dis lagish."
Hobe Ferris, a soil importer from Eastern Tennessee, said this:
"Gots nuffin' ginst no furners but done wan none comin' here talkin 'Nadian or Mexican talk."
Finally, Jaspar Hollins, crucifix salesman:
"Who ya all callin' a yokel?"
